Ask AF is a new advice column curated for The Peak by two Mustang Media Group staff members, A and F. You asked, we answered. Whether you’re dealing with an extreme crashout you can’t even talk to your therapist (ChatGPT) about, or a question you’re dying to ask: How do I lean in for a kiss? This is your no-judgement zone. Anonymously ask us anything. We will respond with our expert “AF” opinions.
A: There was a time in my life when I’d repeatedly wake up in an apartment that wasn’t my own, and I’d justify my sleepover the night before by telling myself I’d leave just in time for my 8 a.m. class. I’d repeat to myself “You have no excuse,” as I thought about showing up with mascara on from the night before and a bright reddish-purple stamp of evidence on my neck.
Six months and a lot of questionable antics later, I’d think about repeating the same charade. Only this time, down the hall from my fall MOQ (man of the quarter). In most aspects, winter MOQ was the same: tall, witty, lived in the same apartment as the fall one and honestly way too high to do anything but listen to me yap his ears off.
It’s funny writing this a couple years later, remembering F was in that class. She’d ask why I was late, and the answer was written all over my pink-tinted cheeks and eye bags.
F: Sometimes she’d show me her neck, and that was enough for me. “He’s so nice,” A would say, and I’d remind her coming to class on time would also be nice. Though I’d never judged her, as these were experiences I was foreign to. If anything, I pleaded for more stories I could live vicariously through.
Going back and forth in conversations, advice threads and using our 9 a.m. writing class to psychoanalyze our love lives brought us especially close. This is how we found out how freaky and insane water signs can be, but also how good they are at listening, not judging and supporting.
From A crying over a missed connection with someone who she only shared a glance with to F planning a “meet-the-parents,” our paths could not be more different. So now, sit back, relax and take it all in. We’ve read your deepest darkest secrets, and with our qualifications, we’re ready to advise you AF.
We asked students to anonymously submit their situations and rank them on a scale of 1-10 based on their emotional investment. To ensure we were giving new advice, we asked them to tell us any advice they’ve already heard.
1. Every year, when I’m back in my hometown for Valentine’s Day, my ex-boyfriend takes me out to a $300 dinner. He was a horrible person, but I kind of like milking him for that. Should I do it again this Valentine’s Day?
A: Girl, first of all I wish that was me. My ex-boyfriend and I only interact through cryptic LinkedIn profile views. I absolutely think you should continue this tradition as long as you’re just trying to make things even… and not making out… After the dinner, do you usually feel amused or unsettled? If it’s the latter, I think it might be time to find a new hobby. Dump him!
2. My friend group hates my situationship and their friend group. We’re about due for a bar brawl or dance battle. Thoughts?
F: The opinions of your friend group will most likely always be the ones you should listen to. Who is going to be there for you when you’re violently drunk at Frog and Peach and need to go home? Not your situationship and his friend group. ESPECIALLY if it’s about a “situationship”…girl, we left those in 2025. Dance battle might be the move, sometimes creativity is the best form of expressing your deepest, darkest feelings. Dump them all!
3. All of my dates involve smoking. I get too high and can’t talk to my dates! How do I fix this?
A: This happened to me on two separate occasions. I was smoking so much I greened out and cried about my ex for four hours straight. I pivoted to cigarettes for a guy who definitely didn’t want anything to do with me a while later and then developed eczema because of my constant desire to feel like a Lana Del Rey song.
If you enjoy your dates being sesh-adjacent, I suggest planning the date intentionally. Bake brownies or make homemade pizza first, smoke after. You’ll thank yourself later when you’re feeling those munchies. And if all else fails… dump them!
4. How do you ask a girl out? I’ve never done it. I also don’t really talk to a lot of girls and don’t really know how to meet women in that kind of way. Do people just walk up to girls and ask them out? I don’t struggle to talk to people socially, but I can never tell if someone likes me, whether I know them or not.
F: The way women receive this type of affection is a large spectrum — some women like the chase, while some react better to someone who can be upfront with their feelings and desires. A good in-between could be dropping an Instagram follow request, which allows you to make a move without having to stress yourself out socially. However, the only way to know if someone is interested in you is if you go and find out yourself! Experience is the best teacher. #YOLO
5. I would love love love to have a boyfriend. But I fear that I am only in love with the idea of a boyfriend, not the actual thing. The problem is I don’t like talking to guys IRL. Any time a guy sits across from me at the library, he’s watching a YouTube video without headphones and I just get so annoyed. I always avoid guys, will I ever get a boyfriend? My friends have encouraged me to make guy friends, but I choose peace. I’ve also been encouraged to just date girls, which I think I’m open to, but definitely nervous because that’s a lot to unpack.
A: So true. One time I got the ick watching a guy send an email on his phone. It’s kind of daunting to admit that sexual exploration to yourself as someone who has had this vision of who their person is for their entire life. College is the best time to really feel out what you like and dislike, no strings attached. Sometimes I justify my actions by remembering my four-year long slumber party with a side of classwork won’t last forever and you really only live once! Your partner won’t be a man in the library with no social cues. But you might find them if you let yourself explore your own identity, interests and life-long dreams. Investing more time in understanding what you like might let you imagine sparkles and hearts around that one person who’s unlike the others in your class. That feeling of not finding love? Dump it!
6. I am in a six-month friends-with-benefits relationship, and he says he doesn’t want a relationship. We have accepted that boundary, but sometimes he goes and kisses my forehead and talks to me ALL the time about his day and the things he is doing, or gives advice on some stuff I’m dealing with. People have told me to stop messing around with a guy for this long that obviously doesn’t want me and to notice the fact that he f–ed a hooker.
F: I don’t even think the biggest issue here is that he had sex with a hooker; that’s just him using his free will in questionable ways. I’ve seen far too many of these relationships — every alarm is going off in my head. Two words: Commitment. Issues. Every man has them; it’s just in their DNA. The first time I heard the lame “I just have commitment issues” excuse from one, every single ounce of empathy left my body. He likes the idea of a relationship, but loves the idea of having no strings attached even more. He knows a relationship is going to force his brain to think critically for once, a burden you shouldn’t need to deal with. I would get out of there STAT and find a real man who respects you enough to be fully present. Dump him!
7. I always crush on people who are emotionally unavailable!
F: Emotionally unavailable people are never going away, and your gravitation towards them is a sign that maybe you have some internal work to do. In this day and age and in this ECONOMY, we cannot afford to put energy into people who are obsessed with being “nonchalant,” and remaining a mystery to everyone who shows interest and affection in them. Reflect on WHY you crush on these people, because unfortunately, there is probably a lingering piece of childhood trauma that is crushing you instead. Dump them!