This article is in response to Sarah Bailey’s holy war against St. Patrick. Sarah in her article starts off by saying that St. Patrick’s Day may cause us to “feel the need to celebrate.” This is just untrue. It’s a religious duty to celebrate, not just a feeling. It is known that Christians drink wine at church as it symbolizes Jesus’ blood. True to form, drinking green beer at church (usually a bar of some sort) symbolizes drinking St. Patrick’s blood. The only difference is St. Patrick encourages his worshippers (the Irish) to drink as much of it as they can as March 17 is the day to show off how athletic your liver has become after a grueling year of intense training.
Also, I must add that on St. Patrick’s Day everyone is Irish. So when you say to “drink in moderation” that’s like saying “exercise in moderation.” When you go to the gym do you only do one push-up an hour to give your body a chance to process the push-up? No. The truth is you should be training your liver all year for St. Patrick’s Day, because on that day you’re not doing anything in moderation; you’re going full-out just like you would if you had been training for a marathon all year.
Sarah’s article is also filled with misinformation. For example, Long Island Iced Tea is said to contain 780 calories. This is just wrong. Anyone who takes a moment to Google “Calories in long island ice tea” and clicks “I’m feeling lucky” will note that a Long Island Iced Tea only has 226 calories. I just assume the rest of the calories are exaggerated as well. Shame on you, Sarah Bailey.
Also in your article you mention what to do before, during and after drinking. Well you were 90 percent correct (beer being 90 percent water). Replace “glass of water” with “Tall Killians Irish Red” and you’re dead on. If the next day you’re blessed with what some people call a hangover, remember this is just a reminder from St. Patrick that you are “out of shape.” In the class of Alcohol 101, you fail, Sarah.
Materials engineering junior