Ryan Chartrand

I recently tried to kill two birds with one stone. This being the time of year when term papers, projects and finals heap themselves upon students with reckless abandon, I am doing a project on the bar scene in San Luis Obispo. I can’t give up my night life just because I have a couple of projects and term papers due, can I?

The best of both worlds, right? Not so much.

It is tough taking crowd photos at bars that are playing techno like it’s Germany circa 1994. The pictures come out looking like a hallucination.

Also, there are some bouncers who have seen “Road House” one too many times and want to know why you are taking a picture of the sign in front of the bar. “What are you doin’ man?” Chill out Swayze, it’s for a project.

In addition to these setbacks, let’s not forget every girl in the bar getting the stalker vibe when you are taking a picture in their general direction.

Nonetheless, I have fought on. I have some really awesome pictures, as most intoxicated people are inviting to anything holding a camera. I also have some great audio, you would be amazed at some of the conversations that go on in the background at bars. You just tend to forget them for obvious reasons.

Try bringing a tape recorder with you, it’s like hearing a conversation from a parallel universe. Plus, it’s fun because you don’t know the context. So the next morning when you review your tape you will have no idea what the guy standing next you meant when he said, “Bro, why is your hand in my pants?” Now, because I was sober I know it was some guy talking to his grabby buddy who was trying to reach for a dollar out of his pants on pint night.

However, if you were hung over, you would find this pretty awkward.

The next step is going to be catching a cab home, which should prove to be epic. Cabbies aren’t the most cheerful people in the world. I’m sure they will be thrilled to have four drunken patrons in the cab, followed by spontaneously random flashes from a digital camera.

One thing I’m hoping for is a mass exodus to the bars by my fellow procrastinators. For one thing, I really don’t want pictures of empty bars, that dog won’t hunt.

Remember, there is always tomorrow, until tomorrow comes in the form of an 8 a.m. final or 10-page paper.

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