The Monday Manure is a satire column created to find the humor in the daily life of Cal Poly students. If you’re looking for news, this is not it. If you’re looking for sports, this is kind of it, because we’re having a ball.
Zach Berston is a journalism senior and a satire columnist for Mustang News. The opinions expressed in this article do not necessarily reflect those of Mustang Media Group.
With the extreme rise in popularity of study abroad programs and their high cost, the Cal Poly administration has voted to open a new program, allowing students to study abroad in the city of Bakersfield.
The program is aimed at students who want the study abroad experience, but are looking for a lower cost option. In fact, not only is the program free, but students will actually receive a $25 Starbucks gift card in exchange for signing up.
Bakersfield, which has been called the West Texas of the West Coast, has an abundance of activities for students that almost directly parallel a study abroad experience in Europe.
While students studying abroad in Europe might develop the habit of smoking cigarettes, Bakersfield Study Abroad Students can get the same level of lung damage living in one of the United State’s leaders in poor air quality.
When you look on social media and see your friends in Europe going to thrilling, Champions League soccer matches, you can hit them right back with a picture of you at the historic Sam Lynn Ballpark. While the Bakersfield Blaze minor league baseball team does not play there anymore, you can still close your eyes and imagine what it must have been like to witness a home game in their farewell season with a deafening crowd of 43 fans shaking the earth with their spirit.
European study abroad students are known to take short satellite trips to neighboring countries but the same experience can be achieved in Bakersfield. Students are just a short drive from thrilling cultural experiences like Oildale, a city known for its crude oil production, or Oil City, a city also known for its crude oil production. If those don’t sound appealing, you can drive just a little more north to Saco, a city which is known for its crude oil production.
Look, Bakersfield isn’t Florence, Barcelona, London, Sydney or Paris. But it is Bakersfield, and that’s something.