Isn’t it funny how romantic couples decide they need a “break” from one another? It is sort of amazing how someone could want a relationship, and claim they love a person, but than decide they need to go on a break for a period of time just to test the relationship.
Isn’t the whole point of a break to get away from your significant other for whatever amount of time, and wouldn’t that signify that you are having problems, or maybe even that the relationship should be over?
Couples often defend this concept of a break by saying, “We just need time to figure things out,” but in all honesty, maybe the relationship just isn’t meant to be. And not only that, but why do you have to go on this “break” at all?
It seems a little over dramatic to be “on a break.” Sure, you may just need some alone time, but by putting this title on it, you’re making it more difficult for yourself and your partner.
The title and amount of time isn’t the only issue with the break concept. Another issue is the rules that people form for their so-called “break,” which make this period much more ridiculous .
There are rules such as, you are allowed to date other people, but you’re not allowed to sleep with them. Or you can’t date at all; it should only be a time to think.
In reality, if either partner is contemplating dating other people, the relationship really shouldn’t exist in the first place.
Another way people try to justify their break experience is that they’ve met someone else who they believe might be a better fit for them, or they just want to mess around a little. You know, get that college experience. But the reality of it is that people, both men and women think about messing around with other people all the time, but actually wanting to follow through with that act should feel completely wrong if you’re truly in love with your partner.
Furthermore, if you’re thinking about going on a break to see if it would be possible to live without this significant other, then there are bigger issues to deal with, and it seems a bit unfair to your partner to put their emphasis in your life on trial.
I have seen many couples go through this break up and get back together trend. It turns into one of those annoying relationships that has everyone turned off to dating completely.
It only seems like the best of both worlds: you could go out and mess around, and then after you’re done with that, you could come back to this person who is just waiting for you. In reality, that type of setup is poisonous for everyone involved. No matter the case, with any type of “break,” someone gets hurt.
Here are a few hints that should alert you to an impending break:
1. The relationship has become distant.
2. Little fights break out over nothing.
3. You find yourself wondering if there are other fish in the sea.
4. Avoiding one another becomes a regular occurrence.
A break might help to temporarily avoid problems or it might even get that one-night-stand with that hot girl from the gym out of the way. In the end, though, when you return to that relationship, the dynamic will have changed, the problems will still be there and you will likely find that a permanent break-up is in your future.
As a columnist who has written plenty of mediocre columns over the past four years, I try to not be openly critical of other people’s opinion columns in a college newspaper. At least typically, an okay columnist or even a bad columnist has something unique and passionate to say even if they say it badly or construct their argument badly. Becking’s relationship column does not even have this. It simply retreads already established dating myths and supports them with little to no evidence or reasoning. It is just a big bunch of generalities reinforcing everything a large mass of people already believe. “In reality, if either partner is contemplating dating other people, the relationship really shouldn’t exist in the first place.” Really? Are relationships truly that all or nothing when you get down to it? Or is that just what your very upright and moralizing attitude has caused you to believe? Please give us back something like last year. I would much rather hear someone try and construct an argument (even a weak argument) in favor of handjobs than sit through a sexually uneducated prude’s musings on the collegiate dating situation.